Recently, I had someone steal some pictures from my blog album and use it in their blog to convince his friends that he had taken that trip!

I left a comment asking where he got his pictures from, but to cut a long story short, the photos are still there. He did some crude photoshop of it, but it's pretty obvious they were mine.

I think he did it for the sole purpose to getting attention and trying to make me (and his blog audience of about 100) angry and have something to talk about. I think it also increases his hits (he has AdSense). So I've decided to let it go and just try to ignore the fact that my photos are floating around on someone else's page... =(... advice now would be great.

Things I have learnt from this experience:

1) Photos on the net are photos on the net. Don't be naive and assume that people won't take them and use them for their own purposes. Nobody cares about intellectual property. So even though you are putting up photos to share with your family and friends and you don't mind them downloading them... there will always be about 10 strangers downloading for every family member.

2) People do stupid things to get attention.

3) Your identity is precious and your responsibility.

4) People are big fat liars.

I just wanted to share a story with everyone about an experience I had online last year. It is common for youth today to be technology and information savvy, but how good are we in protecting ourselves?

The Beginning

When I first got to University, I joined a local voluntaring group for young people. I met the members, who seemed very nice and quickly became one of the leaders. In doing so, I was given the responsibilities to send out club emails and organise events. I did so, giving my email address for people to reply to. I didn't give out my cellphone number, because I knew that was going too far! Anyway, I added a lot of people on my MSN list and it seemed great - I was making heaps of friends in a new city!

After a while I noticed that this particular guy kept approaching me at every meeting and saying hello, making small talk. That was fine, I mean, no harm in making more friends right? He also began to message me on MSN.

The Middle

That was fine too. I mean, I chat to lots of people on MSN, so it's not that big a deal. We would chat a bit when I was procrastinating homework and we would talk about random things that were vaguely interesting and funny. But then he started dropping hints. A sexual word here and there... one or two comments. He began to ask me questions about my sexuality, my attitudes towards sex, my experiences, which is OK I guess if we were really good friends, but this was only our second conversation! He would make derogatory comments,like, "I bet this is the most attention you've ever received from any guy." He would use disgusting words that I didn't know the meaning of, so i'd have to look them up on the net later to realise how gross they were.

Unfortunately, alarm bells didn't ring fast enough for me. I felt it was inappropriate and I felt uncomfortable. Unfortunately, I just told myself it was nothing and laughed it off. Even when he made the comment, "do you want to see mine?" I politely said no and continued the conversation with the weather or... yeah, the weather. The conversation lasted for hours. I don't remember much of what was said. Maybe I'm blocking it out?

Anyway, that night I was thinking it through and I realised that it was completely inappropriate. I started shivering and freaking out - what had I said exactly? Why was he asking me those questions? What were his intentions? Would he have asked those things in person? Was I giving the wrong impression that I was OK with these conversations? My personal stance is that it is OK to talk about sex. I put it in the same category as talking about bras and underwear with friends. But only as rational, sensible conversation. If the conversation turns dirty, then that's the end of that.

Believe it or not, we had another conversation. Much shorter and I was more guided. But I thought, if I had another conversation where we didn't talk about sex, then he would get the message that I didn't want to talk about those things with him. EVER. But no, he kept turning the conversation that way and actually brought back some of the things I had supposedly said in the previous conversation. This was most unenjoyable. I ended the conversation and blocked him. I didn't know what to do and was not quite sure about what had actually happened.

The End

There is still the problem that I saw him at every club meeting, which was held every two weeks. He would make the point of sitting close or making disgusting comments like, "hey, you look good in that shirt". He would try to begin with normal conversation, but from experience I knew that he would turn even the weather into something sexual. At this point, I think it was exam period so I didn't really talk to anyone about it. I was too busy studying for exams.

After a while, I started feeling threatened. I walked to and from the meetings, which were held at night, when it was dark. Though the walk was short, only about 5 minutes, I did not feel comfortable walking by myself and did not want him to know where I lived. But fortunately, exams finished and Uni finished for the year and we all went home for the holidays. I forgot about the conversations during the summer break. That was 3 months.

When I got back the following year I was reminded again of this horrible person when I turned up at the meeting. He kept asking questions like, "oh, how come I don't see you online anymore?" I was more angry than scared at this point. So I made the effort to talk to some of my friends and eventually the other club members about it. It turned out that he had made approaches to other girls, too - none as explicit and disgusting as my experiences, but he did ask a few of the girls out (with the WORST pick up lines, hahah). Well, needless to say, they were rejected in the most polite manner because we are all good girls. =)

We began discussion about how to deal with him and how to kick him out of the club (there are specific rules and regulations). Meanwhile, we all collectively stopped talking to him. I appreciated this so much we were all there to support one another. One of my friends said that he would come ride over him in his motorbike and then beat him for me! Which is a nice offer. I didn't take it up though.

But basically, that's as far as it got. He's still out there somewhere. We've warned basically everybody we know (and more) and we're pretty sure he can't hurt anyone because he's such a coward. But in hindsight, I would have liked to have done more. He keeps trying to email, but I have blocked that address too.

Synopsis

I urge you all to be familiar and clear with where your boundaries are and not let anyone push you further. No matter how friendly they may seem. Even if they disguise attacks behind humour, they are still attacks and you should never make yourself easy prey. If you start feeling uncomfortable or if you can feel they are playing mind games with you - definitely time to leave.

So I use to one 'carefree nigga' online. I was never one to hestitate giving my number, person or biographic details. I was but just in my young days of bridging the digital divide and at the same time learning to use the computer via the internet.

And it never dawned to me until now, how many sites there are teaching you how to use the internet and your computer and does not even put in one point of online security.

I was never really abused online like most of the sotries I have heard for example the produced by Childnet International. Online security/safety I must say is a really important issue and it is sad to say that we take it so lightly.

Its like you go into a chatroom and you are bombarded with "asl" and immediately you start giving out your information without really realising easy it is for us to adopt to the norm of chatrooms and then one thing leads to another ... we give out so much information that our 'new friend' - the perpetrator can find us within a jiffy!

I became educated about online safety and security when I attended the Cable & Wireless Childnet Academy back in 2004. I was became so educated that my interest in chatrooms diminished instantly. I must really commend them for their excellent programs through the Kids SMART and Jenny Story program. Check out this link to read up on their projects http://www.childnet-int.org/. It's however a pity that resources are so limited for these things that programs such as these cant be extended all over so as to encourage kids to be safe online.

Let us all as cyber-citizens be more careful when we are online. And at the same time let us caution others when we meet them online so that the word can move around and more people can exercise control in the amount of information they give out to these strange persons who sometimes provide them with opportunities. And let us at the same time remember that while teaching our friends, kids and family to use the computer and by extension the internet is fine but teaching them to be safe online is really important!

Cyber Security Practices to Stay Safe Online

The widespread availability of computers and connections to the Internet provides everyone with 24/7 access to information, credit and financial services, and shopping. The Internet is also an incredible tool for educators and students to communicate and learn.

Unfortunately, some individuals exploit the Internet through criminal behavior and other harmful acts. Criminals can try to gain unauthorized access to your computer and then use that access to steal your identity, commit fraud, or even launch cyber attacks against others. By following the recommended cyber security practices outlined here, you can limit the harm cyber criminals can do not only to your computer, but to everyone's computer.

However, there is no single cyber security practice or technological solution that will prevent online crime. These recommended cyber security practices highlight that using a set of practices that include Internet habits as well as technology solutions can make a difference.

The National Cyber Security Alliance's Top Eight Cyber Security Practices are practical steps you can take to stay safe online and avoid becoming a victim of fraud, identity theft, or cyber crime

Cyber-Seduction: Danger on the Web is a new educational documentary video that alerts teens to dangers on the internet. Two teens, Caroline and Brian, tell their stories of deception, poor judgement, running away, and abuse that begin chatting innocently on the internet. Both teens hope that by sharing their painful experiences they can help others avoid danger on the web.
"Some 90-year old guy can tell you he's 16 and put up a picture of his grandson," says Caroline. "In my case it was the guy's nephew." An FBI agent explains that by developing online relationships over a period of time which appear to be sincere, perpetrators are able to lure teens into meeting them in person. The emotional impact of these stories will encourage junior high and high school students to use critical thinking and make safe choices when using the internet.